Wednesday, February 13, 2013

Starting off my 30's with a Bang!

Greetings from my third decade!  That's right, this crazy lady turned 30 on February 10.  And it feels great!

All last year I was super excited to turn 30.  It was so symbolic of all of the fantastic life changes that I had experienced and I do indeed feel more confident and self assured, so I had expected turning 30 to be wonderful.  Well about a week before my birthday, with no big party, no vacation, nothing planned, I started to have an early life turning 30 freak out.  30.... it sounds so.... OLD.  Omg.

But, when the time came, with the help of family, friends, and my honey, turning 30 was AMAZING.  I like to say I started it off with a bang because I started it off with 3 consecutive "blow-outs" at Dry Bar, a salon that only washes and styles hair. I had answered an ad on Craigslist where a girl was looking for a hair model.  I got there and they switched up the stylists and the guy who was doing my hair needed a model for the next day.... I was having so much fun (drinks, snacks, and a free hair-do.... yes please!) that I offered to return on Thursday.  Then I mentioned wanting to look pretty for Friday night and he said "Well we are having a soft opening so come back then and get your hair done"... so I did!  They all did wonderful jobs.... here are my first 2:
You're surprised right???  WHOA Bangs!!!  Yeah.... since right before Christmas.  And let me tell you it is amazing how bangs change what people say.  I got different reactions but my personal favorite was what B had to say when I came home from the salon that fateful day in December: "What happened?!".  Ummmm I got bangs!  That's what happened!!!!

One thing that I heard repeatedly (other than "you look like your mother"  or "I like you better without them") was:  You look so YOUNG!  Well.... thank you very much!  Here is a picture from right after I first cut my hair with B, me, and B's son Bailey..... we joked that people probably thought I was either his sister or girlfriend.... certainly not his stepmother to be!


And as you can see, the bangs were a little.....short, shall I say?  I don't know the best way to say it other than I was not 100% on them.  And I was stuck with them.... STILL AM!!!!  However, see above with my model doggie Luke.... I learned how to work with them. I think that is a cute picture, right?

So, I digress... I turned 30 with bangs, and with a bang.... here's how!

Thursday night I came home with my hair done, and the salon had been giving me wine.  The girls really liked me because on Wednesday I had brought Aidan with me and not only is she the cutest kid ever, she was PERFECTLY behaved.  Like not a peep, not a whine, not an anything.  They were so nice to us, and remembered me when I returned Thursday.... child free.  And since I was sans-child, and I was turning 30 in a few days.... why not live it up?!  I took them up on their free wine offer.

And I think I am one of those people that is in the business of  "Once you get started, why stop?!".  B came home to a tipsy lady, because I just continued the party.  Well, WE did.  You see, that is the one thing about us that I love so much.... all we need for an amazingly hilarious and fun night is us two and some cocktails.  We had a full on Thursday night party in our "Cabin" (house)....and come Friday morning oh man.... I was HUNGOVER!

However, I hadn't anticipated our imromptu fiesta so I had already planned to "hike" the Stanford Dish (google it... it is a walking/running trail that overlooks the entire Bay Area).   God Bless America, I actually got up and went!!!  So proud.  After that I tried to relax and get ready for my final "blow out".... a NON alcoholic blow out mind you!  B had told me he was planning something for my birthday, but on Saturday.  So Friday night we went to dinner with a friend of mine from high school and her boyfriend in downtown Palo Alto and that was wonderful.  She and I got our makeup done (like we were in high school! haha) at the mall, and my hair was all sexified, so I was feeling fabulous.  And we discussed the "surprise" B had planned.

Was it Napa??  Was it SF?  What was the plan???  All I knew was that we had to drop the dog off at my parents' house in SF and that was on the way.  Saturday morning I woke up bright and early with excitement and within about 15 minutes had guessed my surprise.  I am a pain in the butt like that :)  We were staying at the Hotel Vitale on the Embarcadero in SF, AND having dinner at Epic, my favorite fancy restaurant!    Yes, I was happy and excited, but I have to be 100% honest... it wasn't like "Oh WOW I AM SO SURPRISED".  I kinda figured it would be something like that.

And just when I was feeling eh, my honey turned out to have planned the best birthday ever.  Seriously.

We checked into the hotel at around 4pm and dinner was not until 8:30pm, so I suggested that we walk over to the Ferry Building to check out the little shops and wine bars, etc.  We walked over and right when we walked in B saw a cooler with beer on tap.  I am not a huge beer drinker but he loves it so I suggested he get a cup.... afterall the cool thing about the Ferry Building is you can walk around with your alcohol so long as you are inside!  Well, he got his beer, took a sip, and proclaimed how delicious it was.  Of course I had to try it..... and it truly WAS delicious!!!  So, beers in hand, we started wandering the stalls.
In our usual "uniform"! We tend to match a lot!
We wandered the stalls checking out all of the fabulous gourmet foods.... $60 a pound chocolates (YES PLEASE!), $3 macaroons, and $35/lb cheese later.... we were set.  And on a roll with the beer.... we had befriended the guy at the stall where our fabulous beer was and when B would buy a new one, the guy would just top mine off (I am a slow drinker).  But oh how we had a blast!!

Come dinner time, we were feeling good... had gone home to change and get fancy.  Dinner was incredible.  Amazing view of the Bay Bridge, fabulous food, great wine.... and the best company I could ever ask for.

When we were done B asked me what I wanted to do.  Well... I have a confession to make.... I love cheesy bars.  I don't know if it stems from when I was a big girl and didn't want to impress anyone, but my very favorite place to celebrate in SF is at the Starlight Room.  It is a bar and lounge in Union Square that sits on top of a hotel and overlooks the city.  The view is gorgeous, and the people watching is TO DIE FOR!  Think hookers, tourists, and old people.... and always a fun cover band.  At the Starlight Room people truly dance like no one is watching.. because quite honestly... there is really no one to impress! haha!  As evidenced below..... we were God knows how many cocktails deep, and I was dancing like I was turning 30...... just GOING FOR IT!!! lol
B survived the fact that we didn't have a table to sit at (he complained when we arrived) and ended up having a blast also.  He even danced with me.... first time EVER.  White boy can't dance but he tried and  it was so much fun.  He also admitted that he really enjoyed himself ( I think he was surprised!).

Sunday we spent hungover as all get out.  A $150 bar tab will do that to you :X  Woke up at 11:45.... hurriedly showered, and checked out, and had a great lunch at the Cheesecake Factory downtown.  We were supposed to go to dinner Sunday night with my family but we both felt like we had been run over by a truck, so that didn't happen. 

We picked up the dog at my parents' house, drove home, and ended up grocery shopping and ordering pizza.  How funny that my actual 30th birthday was spent pretty much doing nothing...but really, it was absolutely perfect.  

I would also like to add on here that the advent of Facebook really makes a girl feel special on her birthday! SERIOUSLY!  I got so many messages and posts wishing me a happy birthday.  They really made my day.

So, although I didn't end up celebrating in the way that I had envisioned turning 30, I learned yet again that life works in mysterious ways.  I celebrated with the one most important person in my life (aside from my kiddos who were with their dad).... and he managed to remind me why I love him so so dearly. He is truly my best friend.

Cheers.... my thirties better look out because I have a lot planned coming up! haha!

Thursday, February 7, 2013

I'm a lifer

So I am ashamed to admit that I often forget that I have a blog until someone mentions it.  In this case it is someone who I do not even know but who posted the kindest comment on another post!  It is things like that that make me a) feel incredibly special and b) incredibly inspired to keep posting and chronicle my journey.  Like the title says: I'm a lifer when it comes to the sleeve.  Forever changed and forever learning to live with it.

I recently attended a support group for my surgeon's office.  Why I did not regularly attend for the past 2 years I do not know.... but the opportunity presented itself to me and the topic was plastic surgery so it was destiny!  I definitely want to get plastic surgery at some point....but that is not the purpose of this post.

You see, while there my surgeon had two very interesting points that I took note of.  The first being that his goal is not to make your life miserable because you cannot eat anything.  A year or two out, we SHOULD be able to eat more "normally".  The sleeve is simply a tool to control portions and HOPEFULLY a chance for us to learn healthy eating habits.  He asked me if anyone I met could tell that I had had weight loss surgery.  The answer is a resounding NO!  Any time I meet a new person in any setting, whether it involve a meal or not, they are generally shocked when I tell them that I used to weigh 245lbs.  Yes, I eat much less now,  but I am still able to taste pretty much anything.  And of course there are times when I still get mad at my sleeve for not allowing me to consume as much as I want of something!!!  But I am then quickly reminded that that is WHY I got it. Two years and a couple months into this process, I will be the first to admit that it is hard to resist a tasty meal.

The second thing my surgeon said is that about 10lbs of weight gain is completely normal... and here is why:  He likened getting the sleeve surgery to driving a car.  When you first learn to drive you are incredibly cautious; two hands on the wheel, eyes straight ahead, no background noise... just completely focused on the task at hand.  A few years pass and all of the sudden you have the music blasting, talking on the phone, reaching back for your kids..... you are now confident on how to operate the vehicle so you start taking chances.  For the most part, you are accident free.  But it is possible for you to get in an accident.  And that is how we are with our sleeves.

Right after surgery we are super careful about every little thing that goes in our mouths.  Vitamin intake is charted, protein charted, water charted, calories counted impeccably..... we are in safety mode because we know that there is so much to lose.  Come goal time we are learning to cruise.... working out, eating healthy, making good choices....but certainly not as vigilant as when we started.  A few years down the road we are "treating" ourselves every now and again.... aware of the rules of the "road" (sleeve) but fully aware that there are not always police officers handing out bad eating tickets!  And so.... we gain weight.

BUT with that said:  If we can gain about ten pounds but learn to live in a healthy lifestyle that works for us and keep that weight constant (not 10 + 10 + 10+ 10....) then we are doing well.

And although lately I have been very down on myself for being lazy and making bad choices I have to say that if you had shown me a picture of myself right this moment, love handles and all, I would have asked how much money I had to pay to look like this.  I may have gained about 15lbs, but by golly I am still a size 6 and a size small.  I would have looked at me and been rolling my eyes at myself about complaining about my weight.  But the truth of the matter is that once you have a weight issue there is never satisfaction in how "small" you are.  At least not for me.  Even at my fittest, leanest, lowest weight I was wondering "I wonder if I can get into a size 2??".  A size 2?!  Was I freaking crazy?!!!!  I mean, yes, technically I am sure that had I put more work into it, yes, I could have.  But what percentage of the population is a size 2????  I don't call these unattainable goals, I call them unnecessary ones.

So when I say I am a lifer, I am still learning every day how to handle my own desires, my own struggles and my love of food.  I do... I still love food.  And that is a very scary thing.  BUT, I have come so far and am so incredibly thankful for the head start that I have on being healthy.   I really could not be more blessed in all aspects of my life.... which actually just gave me the idea for my next blog post.... I am on a ROLL today! :)