I was indeed "brave" enough to wear a bikini in Hawaii. In fact, I wore a BRIGHT, STRING bikini! And let me tell you, I felt amazing! Well, amazing until I got down to the pool :P I wasn't sure if people were looking at my stomach thinking "holy geez this chick needs a tummy tuck!" or if it was just all in my head. I'd say it was all in my head, but I know how critical I can be for no apparent reason so hey, maybe people were thinking that. Who knows?! But in the grand scheme I think I look pretty good in my bikini..... so good that I made Roger take pictures to commemorate the moment!
me on the balcony of our suite at the Sheraton Waikiki. I wore this bikini 9/10 of the time we were at the pool!
Aside from all of my confidence and new found self appreciation, I wanted to let you all see the "real deal" shall we say, because I have the ability to select the best pictures of myself to share, and it just so happens that my husband is a very good photographer who knows what an unflattering pic looks like. So he is smart and angles the camera appropriately! haha.
On day 2 of our trip, we decided to make a trek to Wal Mart in Waikiki on foot. It's about 1.5 miles from the hotel. Not far at all. But I decided to be sporty and wear a sports bra and shorts. Once I put it on I thought... I gotta take a pic of this, it's definitely not what I am sporting on the beach! And what "this" is, is my skin! I had a friend ask me about my skin and I thought she meant skin on my face... she had to specify that she meant saggy skin, or elephant skin as I like to call it!
So... check it out: This is what I look like "naked"... sorta:
Ok so from the side, my stomach is flat. Weird, right? But to be honest my stomach pre-fatness was always pretty flat, even at a size 14. I am just lucky I guess. My coworker asked if I was sucking in in this picture and the answer is "no". I really look like that. I am just holding the camera up :)
This formatting thing on the blog kills me because here is where I would insert another picture but unfortunately when I uploaded them I uploaded one right justified and the other centered so I have some words to kill to take up space. Ahhhh.!!!!!! Darn blogger! And I insert all of the pictures first now because I learned the hard way that if I do it as I go I have to reformat the entire thing like 1000x. So irritating. Anyway.....
Oh wait! I unjustified it I think!!! Woohoo! Ok so below is my stomach up close and personal. I did lower my shorts because thankfully most waistbands hide my "elephant skin". But here you go... scars, stretch marks, elephant skin, and the weirdest belly button ever. I wish I could explain why my belly button looks like that but it has forever and a day, so to be honest, I don't know why my innie is so innie!
Well, just had to delete another picture. GRRRR. Ok back to the important info!
I am at 150lbs now and I still have another 25 or so to go. So I am really scared to see what that extra 25 brings as far as extra skin. My thighs don't look so bad, but if I turn them a certain way you can see the skin elasticity is jacked up. And my stomach well.... yeah see above. I DEFINITELY need a tummy tuck. Not that we can afford one at the moment! But realistically I am going to need that skin cut off and my belly button reformed in order for me to be "happy". But along with that I'd like some new boobs and a butt and thigh lift, which now we are talking a total body makeover... can't say I am up for that in the grand scheme! Thankfully I did this in my 20s so I have another 50-60 years to perfect my body :P It sags and I lift, repeat. Haha!
But one reason I know that I am going to want/need a tummy tuck sooner rather than later is that I am noticing that with some pants the waist is tighter than the thighs. And my entire life, I have had thick thighs and hips but a tiny waist. So the fact is that that extra however many inches of skin is definitely there and the more I lose the more prominent it becomes to me.
Thankfully I am tan from the vacation and Lord knows that tans make people look thinner, happier, healthier, etc. Yes, I know, I know, skin cancer is a real thing. I did wear sunscreen and at about day 4 I started spraying the hell out of myself and Roger with SPF 50 because I could tell we were all sunned out. I am not one of those people who thinks a burn must occur before you can tan. Hell no. I want nothing to do with any sort of a sunburn, so the day I got pink was the day I armed myself with a super high SPF! And now I think Roger is a convert to protecting himself as well. He went on a floatie in the Pacific for like an hour and a half and was FRIED!!!!! As in he looked like he was wearing white shorts on a pink body without clothes :P
The bright side is that no matter what, my facial skin is still glowing. Perhaps from the fact that I wear sunscreen each day and moisturize each day. Or maybe I inherited good genes. Or maybe I am just thrilled to be a newlywed who just spent a week in Hawaii and got to wear a bikini because...... I AM ALMOST AT MY GOAL WEIGHT!!!! 5 lbs to go and counting!!!